The Nooner thru the Signs


The Nooner is a universal multi-cultural phenomenon, with origins in pre-history, with an outcome of  undeniable satisfaction, made increasingly difficult in the modern commute-age of double-incomes.  Nonetheless, we deemed it worthy of a survey, and found these stunningly consistent results.


Capricorn:  Nooner on schedule, precisely twice  a month.


Aquarius: Occasional Nooner, if conditions ideal, partner agreeable, and cell-phone can remain on.


Pisces: Dreams of  Nooner all night. Hopes one comes along.


Aries:  Sooner than Nooner, every day.


Taurus: Nooner at home, after hearty lunch , if  finished with shopping and projects.


Gemini: Nooner? What's that? Oh! Great idea! When?  Where? Do I need to bring anything?


Cancer: Nooner maybe, if..., but wait ... no, not now, maybe later.


Leo: Nooner in stretch-limo, cabin-cruiser, or luxury suite, with arrangements made by suitable servants.


Virgo:  Nooner acceptable, if time for both to shower, before and after, and sheets are clean.


Libra:  Nooner carefully considered. 50-50 chance  Odds increase if an evening of dancing is promised.


Scorpio: Nooner rare, as still recovering from all-nighter.


Sagittarius: Nooner nearly impossible, as always arrives late.